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Effective Communicating

Effective communication requires assessing each situation individually. While there is no single right approach, some strategies generally improve communication. These include staying calm, being specific about your needs and feelings without blaming others, listening actively, and practicing your message before delivering it. Proper timing and awareness of unhelpful thoughts can also aid effective discussion.

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49 views

Effective Communicating

Effective communication requires assessing each situation individually. While there is no single right approach, some strategies generally improve communication. These include staying calm, being specific about your needs and feelings without blaming others, listening actively, and practicing your message before delivering it. Proper timing and awareness of unhelpful thoughts can also aid effective discussion.

Uploaded by

magnificentepicurus3066
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
Available Formats
Download as PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATING

Probably the first thing to note about effective communication is that each situation
needs to be assessed on its merits. That is, there are not really any “right” or “wrong”
ways of communicating, as different situations require different approaches. Taking this
into account, however, there are a number of relatively simple strategies that will help
you to communicate more effectively more often and in more situations.

1. Keep calm – if you are relaxed and can avoid becoming distressed you will be in a
better position to hear what the other person is saying, as well as to say what you
want to say.

2. Think very carefully about what you want to say and be as specific as possible.
You will find this easiest if you refer mostly to actual behaviours. That is, what was
it about the situation that upset you? What did you, or the other person, actually do?
What would you like the other person to do?

3. Don’t forget to listen - effective communication is a two-way process.

4. Remember that not everyone always agrees about the way things should be done or
about the way things should be. As such, rather than saying something like “this is
how it should be…”, it is usually best to express your needs by using statements such
as “I want…” or “I would like…”. If this is followed by a description of a specific
behaviour (see point 2) then the person receiving the message should be clear about
what your needs are.

5. Similarly, it is useful to include statements that accurately describe how you feel.
While doing so, it is important not to blame the other person by saying things like
“you make me feel…”. Rather, it is less confrontational, and more helpful to say
something like “when you did …I felt …”.

6. Chose your time carefully – particularly if you are discussing an issue that is
complex and/or potentially distressing, timing is of the essence. Ideally, try to find a
time that will suit all involved, and not necessarily a time when you will feel rushed,
be too tired or when distractions and interruptions will interfere with your discussion.

7. Be aware of unhelpful thoughts – and do something about them (see resource sheets
“Common Examples of Unhelpful Thoughts” and “Managing Unhelpful Thoughts”).

making changes – Dr. Timothy Sharp & Associates (2001)


8. Practice – run through what you would like to say and how you would like to say it
in your mind. Even better, say it out aloud. Even better still, practice in front of a
friend or relative and ask them for feedback. Don’t forget, practice makes better.

making changes – Dr. Timothy Sharp & Associates (2001)

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