1. In the Stanley Kubrick epic “Spartacus,” the Romans offer slaves leniency if they’ll turn in the title character, played by Kirk Douglas. But when Spartacus rises to identify himself, Tony Curtis’ Antoninus screams “I’m Spartacus!” So does another man, then another, and by scene’s end, the infamous “No Snitching” movement is born.
And so, too, is an iconic movie moment, as “I’m Spartacus” became a legendary movie line in league with “You talkin’ to me?” “I coulda been a contender,” and “Don’t call me Shirley.”
As such, the line has generated more parodies and offshoots in pop culture than the “Single Ladies” video has on YouTube. On the occasion of the film’s 50th anniversary Blu-Ray release this Tuesday, here are some of our favorites.
MONTY PYTHON’S “LIFE OF BRIAN” (1979) As the Romans seek Brian (Graham Chapman) in order to release him from his crucifixion, they ask him to identify himself. Caught unaware, as he’s cursing out John Cleese’s People’s Front of Judea, the also-crucified Eric Idle sneaks in with, “I’m Brian of Nazareth.” When the real Brian screams “I’m Brian,” so does another man on a cross; then another, and another, until it becomes a chorus — including one man who announces, “I’m Brian, and so’s my wife.” The gesture of generosity from “Spartacus” is flipped into a cowardly act of self-preservation.
“MALCOLM X” (1992) Spike Lee ends his biopic of the civil rights icon with a depiction of Malcolm’s assassination, followed by footage of the actual murder. Then real African and African-American children declare, in the same spirit of unity as Spartacus’ fellow slaves, “I am Malcolm X.”
“MONK” (2002) The episode “Mr. Monk Meets the Red-headed Stranger” finds Willie Nelson, playing himself, suspected of killing his road manager after a financial dispute. When the police come to arrest him, his band members loyally step up, intoning “I’m Willie Nelson” one by one. The real Willie wisely surmises, “I don’t think they’re goin’ for it, boys.”
“SOUTH PARK” (2005) In the episode “Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow,” which aired two months after Hurricane Katrina, Cartman and Stan accidentally breach a local beaver dam. This leads to
Katrina-level flooding, and a parody of the hysteria and whirlwind of blame surrounding that tragedy that includes the mantra, “George Bush doesn’t care about beavers.” At episode’s end, after Stan confesses, the townspeople misconstrue his guilt for altruism and declare “I broke the dam” one after the other, Spartacus-style, as the music swells, with Stan screaming the details of his crime aloud to no avail.
PEPSI COMMERCIAL (2005) Incorporating clips from the film, here the Romans simply want to return a lost lunch bag with the name “Spartacus” written on the back, and a can of Pepsi inside, to its rightful owner. As a Roman holds the can aloft and screams “Is there a Spartacus here to claim this?” Douglas and Curtis rise, Curtis screams his line, and the noble scene is transformed into a greedy grab for a can of soda as Douglas looks on, forlorn. In the end, the Roman declares that he is Spartacus, and takes the can for himself.
2. BON JOVI WITH GAVIN DeGRAW
Garden State gods Bon Jovi host New York native opening act Gavin DeGraw at the New Meadowlands Stadium on Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday. For your dose of lighter-flicking classics like “Livin’ on a Prayer” and “You Give Love a Bad Name,” visit ticketmaster.com.
Also this week: LCD Soundsystem plays Terminal 5 tonight at 8 and Imogen Heap performs Tuesday at Hammerstein Ballroom. Tickets at ohmyrockness.com.
3. CHRIS FERRIS AND DANCERS
Dance meets sculpture tonight in a show called “Proximity of Clouds” at the Joyce SoHo. A local dance troupe performs amid a sculptural set created by New York-based artist Warren Kloner. 155 Mercer St., 212-431-9233. Tickets are $18 at tickets.joyce.org.
4. HUNGRY FILMMAKERS
What’s better than watching a movie and eating food? Watching a movie about food and then feasting on fab snacks! See clips from six new foodie documentaries, such as “Lunch Line,” and then eat your heart out at the after-party tomorrow at 7 p.m. Tickets are $15. Anthology Film Archives, 32 Second Ave.; 212-505-5181,
hungryfilmmakers.blogspot.com
5. 100-BLOCK ART EXHIBIT
Put on your walking shoes and strut through Spanish artist Manolo Valdés’ newly unveiled “Monumental Sculpture on Broadway,” spanning Columbus Circle to 166th Street. Wanna know what you’re looking at? Bilingual cellphone info accompanies each of his 16 sculptures, on display through Jan. 23.